Opinion

So am I the only one who believes that if someone is having a party, they will let you know if they want you there?

Three different people have asked "Hey, are you going to X's party tomorrow night?" 
me:  "No"
them:"Well whyever NOT?"
me:  "Wasn't invited."
them:  "So?  Come anyway!"

EXCUSE ME?!?!?! 

I was taught LONG ago that invading someone's home uninvited is a good way to get shot!  Well, leastways at 0300 when the lights are all off.

But yeah, I was taught that the host issues the invitation, not the guest.  And I was taught that you don't call up and go "Yeah, my invite must have been lost in the mail!"

This is the only way I know there IS a party, as I've not seen it announced on the list or the LJ-Coms we have in common, and I've not had word from the people hosting the party. 

So why are the people asking if I'm going taking it badly when I say  "I didn't know there was going to BE a party" (for the first one) or "Didn't get an invite" for those after?

BTW, yeah, it's people we're acquainted with, and yes, my daughter and her SO are driving in from PA to attend, and yes, I'd LIKE to go...at least for a half-hour or thereabout.  Ah well.

(They MAY come by here after -- about a 15 minute drive -- if they aren't too tired.  Otherwise we've been instructed to have their presents shipped.)

And no, the girls didn't ask if we were going; they just said they are, thus I believe they know we weren't asked.  And this is OK.  I have the impression it's partly FOR them anyhow.

My quibble is with people who ask if I'm going, then get offended AT ME when I can't go!

Advice on how to handle these folks appreciated.