Freebie -- closed!
Jul. 10th, 2009 08:35 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
zianurayComment with a limerick, a pun, or a haiku. Nothing serious, please!
Original (or just that I haven't heard) is an extra entry.
Winner will be random draw.
Draw will be onSunday Monday Punday evening.
"Prize" will be a half-dozen imps/vials/decants/soap samples/etc. from equally random e-tailers. (Most vials will have been sampled from.)
(reference)
there_she_goes is the winner!
Original (or just that I haven't heard) is an extra entry.
Winner will be random draw.
Draw will be on
"Prize" will be a half-dozen imps/vials/decants/soap samples/etc. from equally random e-tailers. (Most vials will have been sampled from.)
(reference)
there_she_goes is the winner!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 01:51 pm (UTC)Tracy says, "Yeah. What's it called, Sharon?"
Sharon says, "Viens a moi."
Tracy says, "Viens a moi? What's that mean?"
The store clerk says, "Viens a moi, ladies, is French for 'Come to me.'"
Sharon takes another sniff and says,
"That doesn't smell like come to me. Does it smell like come to you?"
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Date: 2009-07-10 01:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 02:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 02:11 pm (UTC)Who's there?
Death.
Death wh
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Date: 2009-07-10 02:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-13 02:59 pm (UTC)Redneck haiku
Date: 2009-07-10 02:13 pm (UTC)Grandma sent grocery money
To Jimmy Swaggart.
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Date: 2009-07-10 02:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 02:15 pm (UTC)Yay!
Date: 2009-07-13 02:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 03:39 pm (UTC)That's a bit imp-etuous of you, isn't it?
(geddit?_
=^..^=
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Date: 2009-07-10 03:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 03:54 pm (UTC)Suddenly, one guy trips while walking backwards. He gets up, looks back, and sees that he tripped over a woman with no arms and no legs. "I'm sorry, ma'am! Is there anything I can do to help you?" he asks. She says "well, I've never been kissed before", and he obliges, centers himself and goes back to play.
He meets up with the other guy and tells him of the woman that lies where he tripped. Guy #2 decides to investigate, and sure enough, finds the woman lying on the ground, with no arms and no legs. She looks up and tells him "I've never been touched before." He thinks about it, looks around, and starts fondling her chest, gives her a kiss and gets up to go back to the game.
Now, the quarterback at this point is pissed, because the two guys have been goofing off and neither on the field at the same time. He ventures over to where the two guys are, and asks them what they've been doing. The two guys explain about the woman lying on the ground and how one was asked for a kiss while the second got asked a little bit more.
He thinks for a minute, and storms over to the woman lying on the ground. "You've interrupted our game twice already, what else do you want, so that we can get back to our game?" She looks up and smiles, saying "I've never been fucked before." He smiles back and picks her up, slowly carrying her towards the ocean.
He asks her, "Are you ready for me to fuck you?" and she nods her head excitedly....He lifts her over his head and tosses her a fwe yards out into the ocean and then calls to her...."You're FUCKED now, ain't ya?"
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Date: 2009-07-10 04:04 pm (UTC)(no wonder I liked it...hehe)
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Date: 2009-07-10 07:56 pm (UTC)Well, not everyone who likes BPAL are the norm's, yanno? :)
Glad you liked it. :)
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Date: 2009-07-10 04:05 pm (UTC)Labs that make you smell superb
or really awful.
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Date: 2009-07-10 04:39 pm (UTC)-Brussel-spouses
If two robots fell in love it would be a relation-ship.
(blame my husband for these horrid jokes ;)
musician jokes
Date: 2009-07-10 05:15 pm (UTC)The seamstress tucks up the frills.
Two people were walking down the street. One was a musician, the other didn't have any money either.
Why do violists spend a lot of time hanging around outside of people's houses?
They can't find the key and don't know when to come in.
Re: musician jokes
Date: 2009-07-13 03:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-13 03:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-13 03:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 05:10 pm (UTC)There once was a man named Dave
Who found a dead whore in a cave
She was missing a tit
and smelt like shit
But just think of the money he saved!
I'll stop. This is why
we can't have nice thingsI never win prizes. ;)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 05:18 pm (UTC)My dad's favorite acupuncture joke to me...
"Hey Karoline, when you stick someone with a pin, does a little doll scream?"
*eyerolls* Thanks dad.
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Date: 2009-07-10 05:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 05:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-13 03:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-13 07:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-10 09:52 pm (UTC)Turtle strains, trying
So hard to achieve union
With a simple shoe
Re: Hope it's good enough!
Date: 2009-07-13 02:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-11 04:23 am (UTC)Fire.
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Date: 2009-07-11 06:18 am (UTC)Earl the garbage man,
Lives in a garbage can.
His jokes are corny and he's always horny,
Earl the garbage man.
:D hahah I sadly take after my dad.
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Date: 2009-07-12 01:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-13 02:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-07-12 12:09 pm (UTC)wind fluttering for a whiff
of that sweet oil
The worst pun in the entire universe....
Date: 2009-07-14 02:30 am (UTC)A STICK!!!!!!!!!!
no subject
Date: 2009-07-15 08:16 pm (UTC)